“how confidential are job searches, I’m the office nail trimmer, and more” plus 3 more Ask a Manager
“how confidential are job searches, I’m the office nail trimmer, and more” plus 3 more Ask a Manager |
- how confidential are job searches, I’m the office nail trimmer, and more
- interviewer wants me to write a fake performance review for my future self
- my employee says her errors are just “enthusiasm”
- is it better to love my job or love the money?
| how confidential are job searches, I’m the office nail trimmer, and more Posted: 12 Jul 2018 09:03 PM PDT It's five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. How confidential are job searches? My question is about job searching when you're already employed. Considering people are well connected to each other in many industries, how confidential are job searches, really? I've been applying and get the feeling that my employer knows! I'm suddenly offered a promotion and given several other perks/recognition unrelated to the promotion. Do contacts give each other a heads-up? If they're ethical, no. Job searches are generally understood to be confidential, and thoughtful people understand that they could jeopardize your current job by revealing to your employer that you're job searching. That said, certainly not everyone is thoughtful or ethical, and it is possible that someone could share the information with a contact, without realizing or caring about the position they're putting you in. (PSA to hiring managers: This is terrible behavior! Do not do this, even if you're sure your contact will handle the information well. It's not your info to share, and you're abusing the trust that you're asking applicants to place in you!) 2. My boss overshares her personal life to an uncomfortable degree I recently started a new temp job. The office is small and disorganized, but it’s mostly a fine work environment. Except that my supervisor is a wild oversharer. I’m also an oversharer, so when I say she goes too far even for me? It means something. She shares things with me I won’t repeat here, both because of the sheer amount of private detail she gave me and because some of it could easily be triggering. These are things she should be seeing a therapist about, or at the least talking with a close friend. Not with the temp. It started on my first day and as it was my first day and the power dynamics between temporary employee and supervisor are such that I have … not very much, I just sat there and made sympathetic noises. I’m not alone with her often, so it took a couple weeks for it to happen again. But it did. And I made some more sympathetic noises and reminded myself the job would be over in a few weeks. I don’t know if she does this with other employees, or just me. For whatever reason, it’s not uncommon for strangers to open up to me about their life stories and problems. Normally I don’t mind, but I’m at work and the detail she goes into has been frankly inappropriate. This job only goes to the end of the month. It might never happen again, and then I’ll be gone. Other than this, she’s kind and and supportive, and has given me projects designed to help me learn new skills for my resume as she knows I’m seeking permanent employment. She also, frankly, is going through a VERY rough time. (Trust me. I know all about it.) Since I’m not here much longer, I don’t know if it’s worth it to talk to her about the behavior or to go to someone else about it, though please tell me if you think I should. I’ve never had problems in a workplace and am pretty unfamiliar with the appropriate steps for different issues. As a Step One, could you suggest possible escape routes if I get caught being her therapist again? If you weren't about to leave, you might need to find a more direct approach, but since you've just got a couple more weeks, I think you can exempt yourself from having to have a very awkward conversation about this and instead just look for ways to extract yourself if it happens again. For starters, I'd find reasons to physically exit the conversation when it takes such a personal turn — for example, excuse yourself to go to the bathroom or get something to drink. Or, if your job involves phone work, you suddenly have some calls to make. Or, if you can say it credibly, you can try, "Wow, that sounds really tough. I'm sorry you're going through it. Well, I better get back to these reports — I want to make sure I meet the deadline." Or even, "That's awful — I'm so sorry! Hey, while I have you, can I ask you about (work question)?" That last one might sound a little callous, but really, what she's doing is not appropriate, given that the power dynamics make you a captive audience, and it's okay to steer her back to where she should be. 3. I'm the office nail trimmer I have a compulsive habit regarding my fingernails and cuticles. I’ve had this habit since a very young age. It started as nail chewing, but thankfully I kicked that habit in early middle school. Keeping them painted was useful, even though painted nails are really not my thing. For the past 10+ years, the compulsion has manifested in picking at the skin surrounding my fingernails. I’m working on killing this skin-picking habit, but it’s been about 20 years in the making and I hardly ever realize I’m doing it, so it’s not easy. Because of this, I’ve started using a cuticle clipper (looks just like a normal nail clipper, but the edges are curved differently) to satisfy this urge in a way that’s safer and tidier for my fingers, and it seems to be helping me be more aware of when the compulsion strikes, since I have to reach for a tool instead of mindlessly fidgeting. The problem is that now when I feel the need to do this at work, it’s way more obvious than when it had just looked like I was fidgeting. I have my own office with a door that closes, so I always do that, but the outer wall and the door to my office are glass. I am conscientious of trying to put the clippers away when I hear someone coming by (the glass isn’t terribly soundproof), but occasionally I’ll miss it. I worry I’m grossing people out, but don’t want to go back to picking with my hands. What say you? The fact that you have an office with a door is hugely helpful here, even though the door is glass. Being seen occasionally clipping a nail in your office with the door closed isn't a huge deal. If they see you in there doing it all the time, yes, it's going to look odd, but if you're mostly stopping when you see through the glass that someone's approaching, you're probably fine. 4. My boss is requiring me to greet him At work we are under some tight deadlines. I was unfortunately called away for a week. While I could not come in to work during the day, I decided to come in to the office to pick something up to help me do work at home. I was tired, didn't want to talk with anyone, and was hoping to get in and out without any conversation if possible. However, my boss noticed me and while on my way out called me into his office. He told me that as the boss he expects me to say hello to him. Not that it would be nice, but it's expected. I can understand exchanging pleasantries in the morning out of politeness. But to require it of your subordinates seems excessive. In the case above, I just wanted to get in and out. On other days if I am there first and busy with projects I don't necessarily want to stop what I am in the middle of just to give a required hello. I know to some, this may seem rude or petty, or some may even view it as not being a team player. However, I find it irritating to stop my train of thought and interrupt my work flow to exchange pleasantries. I know I'm not the only one who feels that way. Anyway, the question I have is, can my boss really REQUIRE me to say hello to him? Sure. He can also require you to wear only blue or to sing him a lullaby as a condition of keeping your job if he wants to. All of those things would make him an ass and a ridiculous person, but employers can set any conditions of employment they want as long as they're not explicitly illegal (for example, as long as they're not rooted in discrimination based on race, sex, religion, disability, or other protected class, or as long as they don't subject you to sexual harassment, etc.). Your boss is being A Bit Precious by requiring you to greet him, but it's a minor enough thing that you're better off just greeting him, while internally rolling your eyes that he’s requiring this. 5. Should I send a cover letter even if a job posting doesn't ask for one? I was reading the job description for an internship. It ended with “please send your resume to Firstname Lastname at email@address.com.” There was no mention of a cover letter or other documents to send. It did not say to not send a cover letter either. I was wondering if I should add a cover letter with my resume in those circumstances. Some advice I saw said that if they do not explicitly say to not send one, I should send a cover letter even if it’s not requested, to stand out as a candidate. Other advice said to not add the cover letter, as it might look like I cannot follow instructions and that the recruiter or hiring manager would have asked for a cover letter if they wanted one. I opted to send my resume with a very short paragraph in the body of the email with the main points I usually underline in my cover letters that are not apparent from my resume alone. I would like to know what you think would have been the best thing to do. Unless they specifically say not to send a cover letter, send a cover letter. Lots of hiring managers read and are influenced by cover letters, but whatever job posting system their company is using neglects to ask for one. It's a very rare hiring manager who will penalize someone for including an unsolicited cover letter, since they're such a standard part of a job application. It's not like you're sending a poem or a link to a future performance review you've written for yourself, which would indeed be odd and a turn-off. You're just including a normal part of an application. how confidential are job searches, I’m the office nail trimmer, and more was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. |
| interviewer wants me to write a fake performance review for my future self Posted: 12 Jul 2018 10:59 AM PDT A reader writes: I am currently in the running for a position I think could be an excellent fit for my career, and I for the company. As part of the interview process, they have asked me to complete a performance review. Basically, I am supposed to pretend that I have been at the company three months and fill out a review based on what I have achieved, what I want to achieve going forward, my strengths, and areas of opportunity. After speaking with the hiring manager, this is meant to get a grasp on my writing skills and self assessment, but I am really at a loss for where to begin. I have the job description and after the phone interview I have a pretty good idea of the position, but I just don’t know where to start! You're not sure where to start because this is ABSURD. It's one thing to ask you to talk about your plan for your first three months (frankly even that often isn't rooted in a ton of reality, but it's at least a more reasonable question), but asking you to assess your future hypothetical self on work that hasn't happened yet is in the realm of … fan fiction. They're asking you to write fan fiction about yourself. Is this someone you really want to work for? At a minimum this is a warning sign that they don't know how to hire, and it may also be a warning about their critical thinking. If you really want the job and aren't deterred by this silliness, you might as well indulge in the rampant speculation that's being requested and fill it out as if you've had an outstanding three months. Take a look at the goals of the position and whatever knowledge you gained in the interview about how your success would be measured, and have at it. Keep it reasonably realistic so that you don't look comically out of touch, but look at it as a chance to reflect back your understanding of what a successful initial performance would look like and what the challenges of the role are likely to be. But seriously, this is pretty silly. If they want to see your writing skills and ability to self-assess in action, there are easy, obvious ways to do that: they can have you do a job-related writing exercise, and they can ask you to self-assess work you've already done. interviewer wants me to write a fake performance review for my future self was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. |
| my employee says her errors are just “enthusiasm” Posted: 12 Jul 2018 09:30 AM PDT A reader writes: I have a new employee who just finished grad school but is not new to work because she worked a few years between college and grad school. Some of the people we work with have been put off by her behavior. She is asking a lot of questions in meetings and making a lot of suggestions about things she knows nothing about yet, rather than sitting back a bit, listening, and learning. She seems to believe that everything has to be done quickly and does not check her work before giving me a “finished” product that has not been checked for errors or to see if it looks okay. As a result, I am getting a lot of things that are not finished enough for me to review them and have to give them back a couple of times. In addition, her writing skills are substantially below what I would expect from someone with her level of education, but she does not take feedback on her writing well. She has also taken it upon herself to do some things I told her I would do and offended a couple of good clients in the process. She annoyed these clients enough that they mentioned it to me. When I have spoken to her about these issues, she has said she is enthusiastic and just wants to get things done. She always uses the term “enthusiastic” to describe what comes across as pushiness. I am planning on sitting down with her and nicely telling her that this behavior is not productive. However, how much should I invest in a new employee with what seems to be ingrained behavior? I answer this question over at Inc. today, where I'm revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and sometimes updating/expanding my answers to them). You can read it here. my employee says her errors are just “enthusiasm” was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. |
| is it better to love my job or love the money? Posted: 12 Jul 2018 07:59 AM PDT Per Thursday tradition, I'm throwing this letter out to readers to weigh in on: I'm a writer, and I like what I do. I know how lucky I am to be in a job that many others would kill for. And I'm alright at it, I guess. I've written for some good UK publications. But I know I'm not the best. I've previously had interviews at places like Elle and Grazia but have never progressed any further. I know how competitive this industry is and I know that there's always going to be someone who's better than me. I've been in the journalism industry for three years and in all my positions, I have never been promoted (that could be because I haven't been at the companies long enough). I currently earn £26,000 in the job I'm in and have been there for around 3-4 months. I took a small pay cut to move from my previous writing job, which I hated. But it's hard to survive in London on £26,000, and as I approach 30, I just feel like I should be earning more. My partner and I are trying to save for a house and so I'm left with very little money at the end of the month. When I hang out with my non-writer friends who earn a lot more than me, I get jealous. They can afford to go on fancy holidays and have plenty of weekend city breaks. They live in nice flats and fill it with nice furniture. They go out for dinner on a weekly basis and are able to buy nice bottles of wine when we meet for a drink. I can't do any of these things, because I never have any money. I have one friend who is a bid writer. The job sounds terribly dull and office-y. But three months ago she was on £30k. Now, she's moved up to £50k. She's been there less than a year. She has told me that if I wanted to make the switch, I'm pretty much guaranteed to get in with a company, as they're always looking for ex-journalists. I guess what I'm asking is: Is it really worth doing a job you love, if you can't afford to have a life outside of it? And is it ok to work purely for the money? Or will I regret leaving a job that is more fun, for something that will likely be stuffy and corporate? As I progress through my late twenties, my priorities feel like they're changing. I want to be able to go on holidays with my partner where we don't have to worry about how we'll live for the rest of the month. I'd like to buy a nice house and live a comfortable life. But I love lifestyle journalism, and I'm worried that I could be giving up on the thing I dreamed of doing since I was young. What if I hated something more corporate? I imagine it would be incredibly hard to get back into journalism – it's hard enough to survive when you're already in it. But what if i never progress in journalism and remain on less than £30k for years? Even now, it's almost too hard to live that way. Readers, what’s your take? is it better to love my job or love the money? was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. |
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